Journey With Sam

I am an engineer and my brain thinks differently from my friends and family. My gut response was not to cry and freak out. My initial response was “What’s next?” My brain likes to work through problems to come up with an action plan. Not having all of the details to make a plan bothered me more than the diagnosis. I needed the information to be able to process what was happening to my body and where to go from here.

The following two weeks were a whirl of doctor appointments, scans, tests, and travel prep. It was surreal to keep hearing about my cancer but also keeping so much hope that they would allow me to go on my Patagonia vacation. I really thought I could handle cancer, but I wouldn’t handle it well without my trip first.

Of course, just to add a wrinkle into everything, a snow storm was expected to hit that following week. I had moved to Colorado a year previously and I had expected Colorado drivers to handle snow better than DC drivers, but that is definitely not true. Thanks to the amount of transplants in Colorado, the drivers here still suck at driving in the snow. I was terrified my Wednesday morning appointment would be cancelled thanks to the snow, so I was able to move it up to Monday afternoon.

My mom and I went to the appointment with the breast surgeon on Monday curious to learn more. I assumed the biopsy results were back since I got the call on Friday, but actually most of the important detailed results were not back. Thankfully my doctor was still able to walk me through as much as possible and defined the results that we were waiting on. She spent about an hour with us walking us through the data.

Once we got the results, it was determined that I have grade 2 ductal carcinoma. It is hormone receptor positive meaning it is estrogen driven. The joys of that means that I am on a drug to start menopause to restrict estrogen in my body. I am one month in and still not feeling the side effects yet. The results showed that the lump is slow moving so I got the go ahead for my vacation! Also because of the size and location of the lump, she suggested a mastectomy instead of a lumpectomy. She also said I needed to meet the oncologist to get her opinion.

A week later I met with the oncologist. The cool thing about my doctors are they are in the same office. They can easily talk if needed and it means I get to go to the same place for everything. The oncologist wasn’t happy with the size of the lump, my age, and several other factors. She said I should do chemo first followed by surgery. This would potentially allow me to save my nipple with the mastectomy and ensure we rid my body of cancer. Neither doctor liked the look of the lymph nodes on the scans either, even though the biopsy came back negative. She also really wasn’t comfortable waiting 3 weeks to start treatment. She asked if I could cut my vacation short. I agreed to miss my last week exploring Argentina.

I was scheduled to leave for Chile on Friday and I got this news on Monday late afternoon. I spent the next few days working with Chase to change my flights and thanks to a doctor note, no one charged me change fees. At least I still got to go hiking in Patagonia for 2 weeks before starting this journey.

On Tuesday, I met with the plastic surgeon. Since I am doing chemo first, it was more of a learning session. I got some details on what a mastectomy entails and the recovery process. I will meet back up with him in a few months when I am closer to the surgery.

Wednesday and Thursday had more scans, EKG, etc. It was a rush to get everything done before I left.

Friday was the big day! I had my chemo teach back and my flight to Chile! I highly recommend against learning about chemo before going on a full day of travel and a 2 week vacation. However, the chemo teach back was informative. I tried to take in as much as I could while also not focusing on the negatives (there are a lot of side effects). Everyone responds to chemo differently so who knows which I will deal with (hair loss and fatigue will definitely happen).

This is the plan for my treatment:

• 8 weeks with every other week of treatment of Adriamycin and Cyclophosphamide
• 12 weeks with every week treatment of Taxol
• Wait 2-4 weeks to ensure chemo is out of my body
• Mastectomy

It is going to be a long 6-9 months, but I know my mind and body are strong enough to handle it. I also have a great support system. And lets be honest, there isn’t another option so I will get through it.