Journey With Sam

Week 1 of chemo went relatively well (I am knocking on wood right now). I am definitely fighting fatigue more than normal, but the only other side effect so far is headaches.

Tuesday– Chemo in the morning and I felt well most of the day until a headache grew into a migraine that night. Thankfully I just took my sleepy anti-nausea meds and slept a solid 10 hours.

Wednesday– I woke up feeling pretty good and spent the full day at work today. I can only hope more days will feel like this moving forward.

Fun thing that happens the day after chemo is that I get an injection from my on-body Neulasta injection. This injection will convince my bone marrow to make more white blood cells to help me fight off infection. Chemo works by attacking fast-growing cells in your body. Sadly white blood cells are fast growing so chemo also attacks them. Neulasta is going to ensure my white blood cell counts remain where they need to.

Ok the fun thing about the Neulasta injection is that it is put on my arm the day of chemo and goes off 27 hours later. It sticks by a strong adhesive and feels like a rubber band is being snapped against your arm when it gets set. The next day you hear several beeps and it starts to administer the medication. It takes about 45 minutes and during that time, I sounded like a ticking time bomb. Thankfully the ticking was quiet so I think only I could really hear it. Once it finishes, there is a long beep and a constant green light. My mom was then able to help me remove it.

Thursday– I woke up with a minor headache. I took some meds and decided to try to go into work. I lasted about 30 minutes before giving up and coming home. The headache just continued to grow all day. I spent most of the day in bed or on the couch sleeping. I started to get a metallic taste in my mouth, but it only lasted for a day.

Friday– Today was about being shaky. I went to work and felt fine other than the shakes. I think it was fatigue in a new form. I did come home and take a nap immediately. Also a 25 minute walk with Callie left me utterly exhausted. Nothing like going from hiking through Patagonia two weeks ago to barely making it around my neighborhood.

Saturday– Feeling pretty awesome today. I joined a couple of friends and the pups on an hour walk today. I am even eating normal today without any issues. Yes, there will still be a nap though.

What did I actually learn this week?

Anticipation is horrible. I wake up each morning and lay in bed for 20-30 minutes because I am afraid to get out of bed because I have no idea how I will feel. It is 20 minutes each morning where I can enjoy petting Callie and feel normal. I have been lucky so far to have limited side effects, but I know that is unlikely to continue as I keep pushing through treatments.

Enjoy every shower! Yes that sounds strange but I really do enjoy my shower each night to get myself ready for bed. I know my hair has limited time so I have been enjoying washing my hair each night. I will, however, be thrilled to not have to shave (pending that hair actually falls out…no one really talks about that).

I know what being tired actually feels like. I have always led a busy life and pushed myself to do more and therefore always have said I am tired at times. I now know what tired actually feels like. Tired is walking 20 minutes and needing to sit on the couch for 20 minutes to just recover. Tired is falling asleep at 8pm every night and sleeping for 10 hours each night and still waking up and wanting a nap. Tired is not being able to convince your body to do things you think it should be able to do.

Dogs are incredible (well actually I already knew that). Callie has been my little shadow all week. She knows something is up and wants to ensure she is there for me no matter what. I absolutely adore her and thank God she entered my life over 6 years ago.

So beyond thankful! I have the most amazing friends and family that have been beyond supportive during the last few weeks. I cannot thank everyone enough for their positive and encouraging words and support.

So Whats Next?

The hope is that I get to enjoy a relatively normal weekend and week before my next treatment on the 16th. I was told that recovery after each chemo treatment is a bell curve, meaning it won’t be bad right at chemo, will increase in intensity a day or two later, and will return to a more normal level. So I am going to run with that thought process and expect the next week to be more normal. I will even try to get out and run, although I doubt I will make it far.

The only other thing to start watching for is hair loss. Hair normally starts falling out within 2-3 weeks of your first treatment. I plan on shaving my head as soon as I start to notice hair loss. This is my way of taking control of the situation. Also I don’t really want to wake up each morning to hair all over my pillow. So sometime in the next two weeks, I will be shaving my head and rocking all of the cute hats I recently bought.